Rewiring Your Inner Critic with Kim Boudreau Smith

June 12, 2024

How to Own Your Confidence: Insights from My Conversation with Kim Boudreau Smith

Welcome to The Lavish Leader, Unveiling Wisdom, a podcast by The Lavish Group. We are a community of powerful leaders and creators, each on a different path and from diverse backgrounds, but we all embody aspects of what it means to truly live a lavish life. And we are here to share our stories. I’m Dr. Erin Martin, your host. Today, we have an amazing guest, Kim Boudreau Smith, the bold and authentic voice expert. She helps professional women develop their speaking confidence, level up their presence, and increase profitability. Kim is a leadership and speaking coach, facilitator, and trainer for female entrepreneurs and high-performing professional women seeking guidance in owning their bold voice.

From Shyness to Stage: Kim’s Journey

Kim Boudreau Smith shared her journey from being a shy child to becoming a bold voice expert. She organized activities and found ways to raise money as a child, but faced mixed messages at home. Her parents enrolled her in dance classes at age seven, which became her whole life until she was 18. Performing on stage felt natural, but her career choices were influenced by societal expectations, leading to imposter syndrome. Kim excelled in corporate America but held back her voice, often retreating to cry in private after meetings.

I found Kim’s story incredibly relatable. Many successful women I know, including myself, have felt the pressure to conform and hold back, often to the detriment of our own mental health.

Breaking Free from the Corporate Mold

Unhappy in corporate life, Kim transitioned to owning a fitness business. However, she struggled with perfectionism, pushing herself to extremes in pursuit of an ideal body image. This relentless chase for acceptance and success took a toll, leading to a life-changing moment when she fell asleep at a major intersection. This wake-up call prompted Kim to seek trusted resources and begin reclaiming her voice.

This moment resonated deeply with me, highlighting the immense pressure we place on ourselves and the critical importance of self-care and authenticity.

The Importance of Voice and Authenticity

During our conversation, I emphasized the significance of voice and authenticity, noting how successful women often struggle to speak their truth. Kim’s story highlights the pivotal moments that drive change, such as her near-tragic experience at the intersection. These moments underscore the necessity of owning one’s voice and living authentically. I believe that embracing our true selves is key to both personal and professional success.

The Role of the Inner Critic

A major roadblock for women is the inner critic, which Kim humorously calls the “hag in the attic.” This inner critic orchestrates self-doubt and fear, preventing women from speaking up. Awareness is the first step in overcoming this critic. Kim encourages writing down the inner critic’s messages and flipping them to self-compassionate dialogue.

I personally have struggled with my own inner critic, and Kim’s advice on transforming self-critical thoughts into compassionate ones is a game-changer. It’s about recognizing that voice and learning to manage it, not letting it control you.

Practical Steps to Own Your Voice

Kim’s approach includes practical steps to help women own their voices:

  1. Awareness: Recognize when the inner critic is active.
  2. Dialogue Flipping: Transform self-critical thoughts into compassionate ones.
  3. Body Awareness: Move from being “heady” to embracing body sensations.
  4. Humor: Use humor to lighten serious situations and make connections.

Embracing the Body and Navigating Sensations

Kim teaches women to navigate body sensations, such as excitement and fear, which she calls “scare-sighted.” This involves embracing feelings and using them to enhance communication. Techniques include deep breathing, journaling, meditating, and mirror work.

I found Kim’s concept of “scare-sighted” incredibly insightful. It’s a blend of being scared and excited, a state that many of us find ourselves in when stepping into new roles or situations. Recognizing this can help us better manage our emotions and reactions.

The Power of Authenticity

Authenticity is crucial in connecting with others. Kim defines true authenticity as showing up “perfectly imperfect” and unapologetic. This involves not just self-care but soul care, deeply understanding oneself to effectively communicate and connect.

As someone who preaches the value of authenticity, I was thrilled to hear Kim echo these sentiments. Authenticity is about being true to ourselves and showing up as we are, which is incredibly powerful in building genuine connections.

Moving Beyond the Fear of Spotlight

Many women shy away from the spotlight, but Kim emphasizes the importance of stepping into it. Whether speaking in front of a large audience or conversing with friends, owning one’s voice is essential. Kim helps women see that they are capable and deserving of being in the spotlight.

I often encounter women who are hesitant to take the spotlight, fearing judgment or failure. Kim’s approach to embracing the spotlight with confidence is something I wholeheartedly support.

Empowering Women in Corporate Settings

Kim’s next goal is to empower women in corporate environments, particularly male-dominated ones. She aims to work with both women and men to create equitable workplaces. This involves men supporting their female counterparts and challenging gender-based disparities.

I strongly believe that true progress in corporate environments requires the support and active participation of men. It’s about creating a balanced, fair workplace where everyone can thrive.

Humor and Vulnerability

Humor plays a significant role in Kim’s coaching. It humanizes and makes connections. She encourages women to use humor to break down barriers and create relatability. Vulnerability, paired with humor, fosters genuine connections and shows authenticity.

In my own experience, humor has been a powerful tool in connecting with others and easing tension in serious situations. It’s a reminder that we’re all human, and it’s okay to show that side of ourselves.

Conclusion: The Path to a Lavish Life

Kim Boudreau Smith’s journey and insights offer a roadmap for women to own their confidence and voice. By embracing authenticity, managing the inner critic, and using humor, women can navigate the challenges of speaking up and living authentically. This path leads to a lavish life of fulfillment, beauty, and love.

For more on Kim Boudreau Smith, you can find her on LinkedIn, Instagram under Her Bold Voice or her full name, and on her website, kimboudreausmith.com. And remember, you too can live a lavish life of fulfillment, beauty, and love.

Keywords: Confidence, Authenticity, Inner Critic, Empowerment, Voice, Leadership, Women in Corporate, Humor in Speaking

I hope you enjoyed my conversation with Kim Boudreau Smith. Her journey and expertise are truly inspiring, offering actionable insights and practical steps for women to own their confidence and voice. Remember to subscribe to The Lavish Leader, Unveiling Wisdom on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, or wherever you listen, so you don’t miss any future episodes. Thank you for joining us on this journey to a more lavish life.

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Love of Self
Abundance & Authenticity
Vitality & Voice
Intuition & Integrity
Spirituality & Self-Expression
Health & Healing
Love of Self
Abundance & Authenticity
Vitality & Voice
Intuition & Integrity
Spirituality & Self-Expression
Health & Healing

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I’m a multi-dimensional powerhouse with an unprecedented combination of experience, wisdom, education and intuition. I’m a high-performing professional woman who has lived through trauma and made it to the other side, truly healed and I am living an expanded, fulfilled life. I’ve worked with hundreds of women and helped them do the same.

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dr. Erin Martin

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